10 August 2010

Getting Older...

Wow! It's hard to believe that summer is almost over. For me it means that in about four weeks I will be moving away from home to go to school. Granted I'm not moving that far. Only about 3 hours away but still its far enough for me. I am very close to my family and I know that I am going to miss them. I am very excited to start school though. I really can't wait to see what September has in store for me. I can barely contain my excitement. Today was a tough day. One of my best friends is leaving in a couple of days for school. She's leaving the country and her school starts earlier then mine. Meaning that tonight we all said good bye to her and had one last hang out session before she leaves. It still doesn't seem real. I can't believe that my little group of friends is being broken up. Its hard. I hope that I will be able to keep in touch with them while we are all off doing our own things in different parts of the world. After spending four years together being practically inseparable its strange to think that we will not be going to class together again next year. I know that everyone feels this way as they are about to start university and I know its time to let go of my high school years as strange as that is. The other day I said I'm going to hang out with my high school friends and I felt incredibly old. Have you ever noticed that you always feel younger then you are. When I was in grade nine the grade twelves seems so old and it was hard for me to picture myself as one of them. Now that time as come and gone and I still in some ways feel like I am in grade nine. When I think of university students I think of people much older then myself and yet here I am about to start university. I am no longer a high school student but a university one. I feel like just when I've come to accept what I am its already over. Getting used to being in grade twelve and then before you know it I was graduating and the year was over. It flew by. It was an amazing year full of good times with friends and classmates. Getting to know my teachers better and being able to focus on subjects that I am really interested in. Grade 12 for me was probably my best year of high school and the one that I most enjoyed. I have no regrets about the past year and I would do everything exactly the same if given the chance. I did everything I wanted to do. I got involved in everything that I wanted to be involved in. That made the difference for me I think. Being able to do everything I loved and accomplish the goals I set for myself at the end of last year. Showing not only myself but everyone else that I could do it and that I was a known figure in the school. It was important to me and while I was often stressed out and looking back I don't really know how I survived. I am glad I did everything that I did because I am a stronger person for it. This past year was one that I will never forget. It was full of great memories and I was able to strengthen my friendships with those who meant the most to me. I know who my real friends are and I am happy with the person that I am. I know who I am. I may not know what I want to do in life right at this very moment or what the future holds or what I will be doing this time next year but I am okay with that because right now I like who I am. It took me a long time to get to this place, but I am happy with who I am. For now thats more then enough.
Love,
Belle

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